Debunking 10 Myths About Blindness

1. Blind people have supersonic hearing.
This is maybe true for some people. I can’t speak for all of my people. I personally feel like I have selective good hearing. If I am paying attention, the environment is just right, and it’s a Tuesday… I might have a little extra special hearing. Don’t even bother talking to me on Wednesday’s though.

2. Being blind means you can’t see a thing.
There are so many degrees of blindness. Some people identify as blind and they can still see. However, their vision could be as low as light perception only. Or, maybe the person can only see shadows. I have also met people that can’t see when they are in bright conditions. When I could still see, I had night blindness. Other people can only see using their peripheral vision. There is a definite grey area to blindness. It is not all darkness.

3. We all know Stevie Wonder.
You would not believe how many times someone wanted to know if the famous singer and I were buddies behind the scenes.

4. Just because I am blind does not mean I know every single blind person who has ever lived.
When my youngest daughter was in pre-school, I had a man come up to me and ask me if I knew *insert name*.
“No, does he have a kid that goes to this school?” I said a little confused. I should point out I had never been introduced to this guy one time.
He put a hand on my shoulder. “Oh no. He lives in Minnesota. I thought maybe because you were both blind…”

5. Not all blind people like to be touched by strangers.
Think back to the example I just gave in number four. When that guy touched my arm, I fully admit, it kind of creeped me out. I am not opposed to contact from other people. My problem was that I didn’t even know this guys name and yet he thought it would be a great idea to touch me. Another time I don’t like to be touched is in cases of my face. I can’t explain it. There is no real reason why. Ever since I lost my vision, I hate when someone randomly touches my face. They could be doing me a favor and getting a crumb off my cheek or a hair out of my eye. I appreciate it, but please tell me first. It saves me the awkward embarrassment of jerking back like I just got electrocuted.

6. No, I don’t want to touch your face.
This is a big one folks. In my experience in the blind community, it is extremely rare that you will find a blind person who wants to be introduced to you and get acquainted by giving your face a rub down. It’s no offense, but just yuck. I have yet to meet a blind person who does this. You know that expression, you don’t know where that has been? This kind of applies to that. It is no disrespect, but we don’t know if you are clean. We don’t know if you are greasy. You could have a poor complexion problem. You could have an open wound on your face. We also wouldn’t want to accidentally recruit you by poking you in the eye. There is just so many reasons why this is just not a good thing. Please, for the love of all blind people, just shake our hand.

7. Yes, I can hear you.
While it is true that some blind people are also deaf; this is not true for all of us. Even still, I can recall on several occasions where someone yelled at me rather than just speaking. Once, I asked a person why they were yelling. I am not kidding here… they actually told me that they did so because I was blind.

8. Blindness does not mean that I am a baby.
People mean well. I don’t in any way think that this is done out of malice for most people. Frequently however, I have had many people talk to me as though I am five years old. I’m not sure what it is about my cane. Sometimes though, it brings out the baby talk more than child-birth.

9. It is alright to talk directly to the blind person in front of you.
I believe this one happens because people are not sure how to act around a blind person. This is nothing against them at all. For instance, I come from a small town. This means that the blind population is not very big. This in turn means that people have little to no exposure to my people. Consequently, this means that sometimes the awkward interaction occurs. It sometimes goes something like this…
“Store Clerk: “Can I help you?” Their eye-contact is held with the sighted person beside me.
Me: “Yes, can you help me find *insert item*”
Store Clerk: Again, looking at my friend. “Does she know what color she wants?”
My friend: “I’m not sure. Why don’t you ask her?”
Unfortunately, this happens a lot. Again, I don’t think they are trying to ignore me. I just don’t think they quite know what to do about the whole blindness thing.

10. Blind people can’t do anything productive.
HA!!! This one is hilarious to me. Blind people are capable of doing so many things. We have jobs. We are athletes. We are parents. We are writers. We are musicians. We are volunteers. I have met so many amazing blind people over the years. Some of them impress me to the point of WOW! I have met blind people who go skiing and sky-diving. I have met blind lawyers. My husband is a blind drummer. There are blind Chefs and actors. There are blind people in the Government and politics. There was a blind person who played college football at one point or another. And the list goes on and on… Blindness is just a part of us. We can almost do anything a sighted person can do.

Thanks for reading.

There is more that could have made the list. Maybe there will be a second edition, so keep your eye out. If you are blind, what would be on your list? Visit the Facebook page and right yours in the comments for this post. If you are sighted, please don’t think I am bashing the way you do or don’t interact with blind people. I am fully aware that the vast majority do not mean to be offensive or hurtful. This post was done like most of my list posts are… to entertain and bring a little humor to the subject of blindness. As I have said a million times, blindness is not the end of the world. It is okay to laugh at experiences. It is even better to talk about them. In fact, that is how people learn.

Volunteering At A Blind School

As most of you know, I was not born blind. Since I didn't go blind until basically adulthood, I have zero experience with blind children. I figured I should probably take care of that since I plan to get a teaching credential to be able to teach visually impaired students.

Where is the best place to do this you ask? Well my friends, let me tell you. I decided to start volunteering at a blind school. Great idea right?

So far, it has been a wonderful experience. I am loving it! I am learning so much and having so much fun in the process. All the staff are fantastic too.

It has been so interesting seeing how this works. I love watching the kids learn on an equal playing field. They don't have to fight to understand. The material is accessible and put in their hands in a way that best fits their needs. Accomodations are a part of every day life and totally normal. Technology is at their finger tips. The staff go above and beyond to give their students the best learning opportunities possible. It is beautiful.

I really love it here. Sometimes I wish I could volunteer more often. It is a great place to be.

I'm still not sure if I want to teach in a general ed school or a blind school, but I'm loving the process of sorting it all out.

Did You Miss Me? Me Too

So for the first time in ages, I am coming to you from my computer. Granted, at the moment I am on my old computer, but am on a computer nevertheless.


I have nursed this one for just about as long as I am going to be able to. I was able to get it to boot up today so that I could get all the word documents off and transfered to my newer one. I thought this mission was already accomplished. However, after looking through my email inside and out, frontwards and backwards... I realized I was wrong... unfortunately, dead wrong!

So, here I am...

I am getting very excited about getting back to work on an official capasity. It feels good to have a laptop on my... well... my lap. Okay, so that didn't sound as cool as I was hoping. You will forgive me right?

I know that in the past year I have really neglected this blog. I could spend countless sentences and endless words begging for your forgiveness, but I am not gonna do that. Do you want to know why??? Beacause it won't really matter!

What will matter is my promise and didcation that I still care about all of you. There has just been a lot going on with life that I can't disclose here. I am working hard to get back to the world of the living. As some of you may know, I have been trying to make myself seen again in the social media world. I am still hoping to get back to the land of Good Reads. That hasn't been difficult without a computer.

I also am well aware that I owe you some blog posts. I am in the middle of my series on my trip across the country to Florida. I am also going to be starting a series on blind traveling in general, blind dating, blindness in school and a blind technology section as well. As always I will be posting about my writing.

As mentioned before, I am going to be transferring the material from my other blog, over to this one. I think it will just be much easier for me to maintain one blog instead of two. Don't you agree? This will take a bit of time because I need to incoorporate the assistance of a seer. I will keep you posted on the development of this.

I will be slowly but surely uploading some of my more popular posts from there soon. Now that I can get to them that is. So, for those of you who have been loyal to bother blogs... sorry for the repeats, please bare with me.

I will be uploading some new videos to the You Tube channel soon too!

Are you as excited as I am? Okay, I know, you're probably not, but put on a brave face okay? Thanks.

Clandestine in audio book form is still in production. Yes, I know... you guys are ready and waiting. I am so sorry for the time it has taken to get it out to you. There has been some complications behind the scenes in the technical world, but I assure you it is coming very soon.

If any of you is good at creating wbsites... please send me a private message. I am looking for someone who can build me a spectacular, stupendous and out ragiously amazing web page. Of course, I should probably also mention that I am looking for someone that is willing to do this on either a volunteer or extremely cheap basis. If you are interested, or you know someone who is, get a hold of me via email or on Playing the Blind Card's Facebook page. The link to both can be found on this page.

Well, I have successfully rambled for long enough I think. I must get back to work transferring files. Thank you for allowing me to take a break with you.

PS... I noticed when I signed in that the blog is getting close to 60,000 page views!! Now all we gotta do is beaf up the ammount of people signed up to follow. Keep doing what you do and get the word out about the page. Remember, I couldn't do all this without you all. That being said, just know that you all rock and I love ya bunches.

As always... Look before you leap

Traveling without eyes my trip across the country part one

After I lost my site, I never would have thought that I would do much traveling. I especially thought it to be true, that I would not travel by myself. Nevertheless, that is exactly what I find myself doing. Well, I guess I should speak about it in past tense, since I have already returned safely. At 30 years old, I made my first trip across the country as a blind person. I should note that I did not die, so the trip was a success if you ask me. Although, I cannot say it was flawless. There was plenty of debacles along the way.

My plane left at like 6 AM Standard Pacific time. Yes, you heard right. 6 AM comes awfully early when you're nervous the night before and cannot sleep. Did I mention it takes an hour to get to the airport from where I live? This means I had to get up even earlier. So I guess I should correct myself. 2:30 AM comes awfully early when you're nervous the night before and cannot sleep. But I digress

My wonderfully supportive parents told me that they would watch peanut. This was perfect. If it wasn't for them, I would not have been able to make the trip. Princess will stay just about anywhere. She is at that preteen age that says Hell, as long as I'm not with my parents I will be anyway. Peanut however, has serious separation anxiety. She does not like to be away from mommy at all. She is only five, but despite her anxiety has the mental maturity of a 12-year-old. She is insanely smart and once she discovered that I would be gone for more than a day she was displeased. My parents do well at distracting her from her mommy longing periods. In fact, I do not think she would have stayed anywhere else for the length of my trip. I know I was not gone that long, but still.

Anyway, she and my mom were fast asleep when my dad and I left for the airport. I was surprisingly awake and alert during the drive. One would have thought that I would pass back out and got a little extra Shadai before take off. No, my mind was racing. The train was moving down the tracks of its own volition and I did not any control over it. I was so excited to see Ryan. He really is the love of my life and to my girls of course. The prospect of the trip hadn't completely something in. I was nervous, but not entirely sure what to expect. This both helped and hindered my box for the long coming day of travel. Okay so I know this is not the first auto correct air from the dictate feature of the iPhone for this post. For those of you who are not familiar with what I'm talking about, for right now I am blogging from my iPhone. I have to do so using the blogger app as well as the dictate feature which allows me to talk to my phone and give you the information you are currently reading. This error however needed to be pointed out because it made the sentence just sounds ridiculous. When I informed you that Ryan was the love of my life this was of course true. But the rest of the sentence is where the train wreck started. It was supposed to inform you that he is the love of my life and to my girls meaning they are also the loves of my life. Okay now that I have fixed the air and inform all of you newcomers that my dictate feature sometimes does not accurately depict my words, I can continue. I suppose I should first let you know that because it does not accurately depict my words, I cannot fix the errors. It will not let me go back due to an excess ability problem with the blogger app.

When we got to the airport, parking was not terrible. This made me hopeful that the airport would not be crazy busy on this morning. Boy was I wrong! It was packed full of people. Security was quite busy. I would have thought choosing an early flight such as I did, I would have missed some of the Podesta tree in traffic 

Once through security, and once I received my cane back. Okay pause, I should probably explain what I mean by get my cane Mac. I was not referring to when you put your items into the tote tray and then simply grab them back out when you were done. I was referring to The man who helped guide me through the metal detector giving me back my cape. He did so after evaluating the material and deciding whether or not he should send it through x-ray. Can I just tell you how ridiculous, absurd and completely obnoxious I found this to me? I am not completely unreasonable. I am perfectly aware that in the past our country has experienced seriously horrible times. I understand the need for caution. I also understand that sometimes people go to extremely drastic measures to get there terroristic ideals into the public. 

In taking that into consideration though, I ask that you take my next appointment consideration. I would like you when you're done reading this post, to please go to your favorite search engine. I would like you to then type in the words blind terrorist, blind serial killer, wind criminals. Then carefully look down the list of results. I am pretty confident that no matter which one of those terms you decide to search for, you are not going to come up with much. There is a reason for that. Can you guess what it is? Well, in case you can't, I will let you know.

Blind people make really crappy criminals!!

I am about 99% sure that my people will not be responsible for the takedown of any government or any other type of public forum. The reason being is how the hell are we supposed to get away? It is not as though we can do the deed and then take off running. Well, I suppose we could, but we would not get very far before the takedown. So what would be the point?

Anyway I apologize I got distracted by a shiny again. I get a little emotionally attached when it comes to this subject because I just do not get it. I suppose I should calm down however it really isn't that big of a deal I suppose. If nothing else, he did give you something to think about that right? Even if not in a serious context, I bet they gave you something to consider in a comical one. Just picture that blind person running down the jetway trying to make away and shoot past all of the security. Don't forget they probably do not have their cane because it blew up on the plane causing a terrible explosion in the airplane toilet that nearly took out an entire roll of toilet paper. The blind person almost didn't get away because the damn flight attendant did not tell them they had to turn off the light in order to get let out of the bathroom. It was a near miss but they were able to get out in time thank God LOL. By the way, getting locked in an airport that Larem on an airplane, not fun. That will be described later on I promise

So anyway… Dot…

Before my flight, I decided it would be a good idea to purchase some soda and possibly something to eat on the plane. I was not sure if Southwest offered or sold food, but I figured if they did, it would be insanely expensive. I stopped at a minute mark style vendor and purchased 220 ounces of Pepsi. Normally these cost only about a buck 50. In the airport however, you can expect to pay $2.50 for one bottle of 20 ounces of Pepsi! This was highway robbery. If it was not for my extreme need for caffeine, I would not have purchased two of the delectable beverages. By the way, yes I noticed that in the beginning of this paragraph the dictate feature has decided to tell you that I purchased 200 some odd ounces of Pepsi. This is of course not true in case you were wondering. I only purchased two bottles of 20 ounces of Pepsi. Now you know

That was the minor debacle number one. Now we move on to minor debacle number two.

I figured it would be the easiest to pick a food place that was near by my gate. Near my gate for things such as McDonald's, big town hero, a few Mexican restaurants and a random café. I figured a sub sandwich would be the easiest to take on the plane. First, it was still in the wrapper. Second, it did not matter if you need it warm or cold it still tasted the same upon calling the day before, I was informed that all of these places would be open at 4:30 AM. This may have been true, but even still, at big town hero there was no one at the counter. The lights were on but no one was home. In my sleep deprived state I thought about stamping my foot and causing a ruckus. Luckily Justin time, I thought better of it. I was still holding my cane after all. I wouldn't want people to think that the crazy blind girl was about to go on a terrorist rampage.

So instead I settled on McDonald's. I ended up getting a couple of sausage McMuffin. Not that you really care, but you should know that after a while on an airplane, sausage McMuffin's do not taste good a arbitrary. Plus the bread does not want ballpark. So I felt like I was savagely eating one of my sandwiches on the plane. The poor old lady next to me probably wondered if she was next. Needless to say I never ate the second sandwich. And just so you know I am well aware of the spelling errors in this paragraph, but there are a couple of them but I do not even know what they are supposed to be so I'm just going to leave them alone. Consider this your English lesson for the day you can edit and revise at will. Ask your credit points will happen if you decide to not judge me for the mistakes LOL

The people at the Southwest counter where amazing. They were very friendly and very nice. They helped me to the gate where I said goodbye to my dad. That was a little weird. We had never had to do something like that before other than when I went to guide dog school, but that was a little different I suppose.

It took me a little bit to figure out how to fasten my seatbelt. These are not much like one in a car. They got that weird flat thing that pops up and it kind of got the better of me for a second before my brain finally switched onto hey I'm not really stupid mode.

The old lady that I mentioned earlier, was so sweet. She sat next to me in the middle chair. Her husband who just happened to be a retired pilot, took the window seat. I did not put up much of a fight there since I couldn't really check out the view anyway. She was very helpful throughout the entire flight process. Once the plane started moving she informed me when we were getting closer to taking off. By the time the tires under the plane left the ground, my heart was racing hard enough to propel the plane on its own. The build up was phenomenal. I felt like we were at the climax of a very cyst suspenseful movie. I was completely terrified, but totally excited at the same time. I have only one once before this easy. But I was under the age of nine and really had absolutely no memory of the experience other than the fact that it was cool and I haven't done it.

The first time the plane hit turbulence it bumped a little. After-the-fact talking to you now, I can admit the bumps really weren't that bad. At the time, I thought the entire plane was going to fly apart. My butt practically left my seat. I put my hand on the old ladies arm hopefully not leaving any bruises. What was that? The words came quick from my lips my breath was short and my heart was in my butt. She left a little removed my hand and then had it gently like a grandmother would. It's okay dear, she informed me. That is just a little turbulence. It means we are getting some when that's all. Nothing to be afraid of.

Right, right, I said trying to catch my breath. Just a little turbulence, no big deal. Right, then why was the damn plane still bumping. Does the pilot not know how to look for air because not have speed bumps? Is that not a part of their training? And if it is not part of the training process, should we the passengers not be informed of this? I did not receive any type of memo about said turbulence. Okay well maybe I am being a little dramatic, but it really was scary. I did feel slightly stupid once I realize what it was. I have heard of turbulence after all and I am perfectly aware that I was not going to die although for a second I kind of thought I was.

I wanted to listen to my audiobook, I was terrified that I would miss something if my headphones were in my ears. The plane was too loud to just have the one in and I knew just knew something would happen if I obstructed my last sense of knowing what was happening in the outside world. I decided I would wait until I could tell that the plane was on level air. More turbulence no more lifting just smooth flying. Once that happens, I would be free to read at my leisure. Until then I needed to diligently pay attention. Nothing was going to cut catch this blind girl offguard no sir.

The flight staff was all amazing. They periodically check on me, help me get my bag down from the overhead compartment anytime I needed and even assisted in taking me to the bathroom. Or I guess I should say the laboratory, as they call it on an airplane. Which by the way, I find to be a little silly. It is not like you are conducting science experiments in there. And if UR I do not want to hear about them.

I would totally recommend Southwest for your traveling needs whether you are a senior or you are a blinding. Okay now that was a dictate debacle. That is not at all what I was trying to say. I meant it to say whether you could see or you are blind you will like flying with Southwest. That is all

The rest of this part of my trip went well. I landed in Phoenix for my layover. That as well as the rest of my trip across the country will be in the next post. Not to give you any type of cliffhanger or anything because I know you're just so incredibly at the edge of your seat and all. It is just that I need to go for now. This post is getting longer than I had anticipated. So in the next post, you can expect to hear about Phoenix and the rest of my flight across the country.

Also coming soon is a series about travel while you're blonde on the YouTube channel. This will be accompanied by my own personal experience as well as the experience of my boyfriend Ryan and hopefully from a few other blind people that I have connected with recently. Be sure to check that out in the near future. It would be a great idea for you to not only subscribe to this blog but also to the YouTube channel. This will ensure that you will know all of the information as it becomes available and public. Plus it shows the support of fellow blind person which is always a prosperous endeavor. The more people subscribe the more the word gets out and the more people learn from all of these ridiculous debacles.

If you have not checked out the YouTube channel already, you can find it by clicking on the link in this blog. It will take you to the YouTube channel directly. You can also find links to my Facebook pages from this blog as well. I would please ask and encourage you to like those pages and share them with your friends. And always remember look before you leap

Disclaimer, I would like to take this opportunity to apologize for any spelling errors in this post. I take great offense to having these errors in my writing posts. I am an author for Hells sake. This should not be happening. I worry that it will eventually ruin my reputation. Or at least make me look stupid if nothing else LOL. Please remember this is the doing of the dictate feature on my iPhone in conjunction with the use of the blogger app on the iPhone. Again I apologize for any convenience that these errors may have caused you. I hope that you have not suffered any permanent damage as a result to but missing and indulging in these errors. If so, you can leave a comment down below and I will take each predicament under advisement I assure you.

Finally an accessible game on the iPhone

I've been looking for months for a fully accessible game that works with the iPhone. I wanted something that was multiplayer. Meaning, I could play with a real live person, not a computer.

Thanks to a friend of playing the blind card on Facebook, I have finally found one! You can find it in your App Store for free! It is called dice world!

It has four different fun dice games that can be played by yourself or with another person. You can connect with Facebook or Twitter friends. Or, if you would rather, you can look for a random opponent.

There are even tournaments that can be played. This will help you earn more gold coins. Well, providing you when that is. I tried one last night when I couldn't sleep. I took the silver metal. I was able to get some more coins in my bank without annoying my Twitter and Facebook friends with postings

There is an option to make dice world ad free for just $1.99. So far though, the ads really haven't bothered me that much. I'm not sure if I will bother with the ad free version or not. Either way, this game is totally worth the download and space taken up on your phone. If you love Yautzy and other dice filled fine, you will love dice world! I highly recommend this for blind and sighted people alike.

Until next time… Remember… Look before you leap… And if you can't, well, that sucks

Possible new feature for the blog

Hey, just wanted to drop a quick note. I am thinking of incorporating a new feature to playing the blank card. I wanted to give you guys a chance to weigh in on this idea.

As many of you know, the iPhone is a very accessible device for the blind and low vision clients. Many of you already have one whether it be an older version, or the latest 5C or 5S. I have recently purchased the 5c.

I have been talking with my boyfriend, and we thought that maybe it would be a good idea for blind people to review different iPhone applications. That is, how they work with voiceover. How accessible are they? Do blind people really have the ability to use them?

There are other websites, YouTube channels, podcasts and possibly other avenues that also explore this topic. I figured it was something that playing the blind card should tap into, as it is a very important topic

If there is ever an application that you would like to see reviewed on this blog, please feel free to shoot me an email. You can use the contact form that is on this page. You can also leave it in a comment under this post. Or, you can also leave your comments on the plane the blind card Facebook page.

Also, if you are a company or person producing an application that you feel would be a beneficial app for a blind user, please feel free to contact me. I would be happy to interview you for the blog. 

Are you a blind user who would like to do your own review on the product for this blog? That is welcome here. If you are interested, send me a message. I will set up with you a time and date that you can do your own post for this site.

In one way or another, everyone has a voice on playing the blindside. So standup, shouted out, and let me know what you want! Thank you and I was always see you next time. Also as always, yet again the dictate feature has made an Ermer I am not from playing the blind side I am from playing the blind card! Thank you iPhone dictate feature. Review coming in for the post…

Did that really just happen? Knocking over display at Wal Mart

Have you ever had one of those moments while shopping that you wish you could take back? You know what I'm talking about, one of those moments where your face is fire engine red and you wish you could crawl under the end Never to be seen or heard from again. I had one of those moments yesterday

I guess in the big scheme of things, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal. To me, it was a very big deal. You see, I embarrassed easily. Well, maybe not easily, but when it comes to myself and being self-conscious… It's definitely not difficult to embarrass myself

I was out at the store with Princess and peanut. Peanut was in the stroller as always. I was behind pushing, while Princess, was leaving. She does a very good job at this. For the most part, she always has my back. Never letting me run into anything. Or at least, not laughing very hard when I do. So sidenote… I just noticed while listening back to what I dictated that there was an error princess was not leaving anywhere. She was Leedean the stroller. Dang it! It just aired again so, I will change the word entirely. Princess was guiding the stroller. … Much better… Stupid talking software!

Anyway, it was all going really well. I had run into anything, not anything over, or made any sort of blunder whatsoever.  When out of nowhere, I feel something thing against my shoulder and biceps on the right side. It didn't hurt or anything, but it did feel as though I ran into a person. I was instantly embarrassed. I always feel bad when this happens. This is mostly because the general seeing public, doesn't look at me as though I am a blind person. When I run into them, they look at me as a rude, obnoxious, awful person. None of which is true of course. They however, do not see it that way.

So as I feel my face flame up with fire engine red mortification, I whisper in a rush to princess. Quotation mark was that a person quotation mark

She looks back, and with just as much emphasis says, quotation mark crap, no, that was a display of towels. Quotation mark

At that moment, my heart fell a little. I hate when I make any type of mess in public. Well it's also a problem when you draw attention to yourself that is completely unnecessary. Some people might not mind this. I am not that person. I quickly and as efficiently as my blind self could manage, tried to pick up all of the packs of towels. You see, these were packs of five full-size towels that were twined together. Process and Little Miss peanut did their best to help. Peanut had three stacks in her arms that made it up past her head. She kept trying to get my attention while I was busy cleaning my own pile. It was hard to hear her through them muffled block of towels.

No one that I am aware of ever came into the aisle. I did hear some voices close by. I kept waiting for one of them to come and see the debacle in the towel I'll.

Princess was having a hell of a time loading the fallen towels back onto the display where they came from. She said that they Wombling. She just knew they were going to fall again. A crossed the aisle from her, there was a shopping cart with a few of the Powell packs inside. Who ever had been building the display must not have had time to finish. Princesse decided we would just put the falling debris into the cart. I didn't like leaving a mess for the unfortunate employee. If said employee happens to be reading this post, I am very sorry for making your work a little bit harder yesterday.

I know I shouldn't be embarrassed. It technically wasn't my fault. It wasn't as though I saw the towels and said to myself self, I am going to knock over those towels because it is fun!

Even still, I find myself feeling guilty. I guess I still haven't gotten used to with the blind blunders that have become a normal part of my every day life. I am getting better at laughing at them after the fact. In the moment however, I am still more to mortified

It is very important to learn that it is okay to laugh at a mistake. We all make them, whether we can see or not. It is how we handle them after the fact that really counts.

Insane Questions For The Blind

In talking to new friends in the blind community, I've come across some funny questions asked by the uninformed. These are just some of the few that I thought would make you smile.

1. How do you eat?

2. How do you have sex?

3. How do you go to the bathroom?

4. More specifically, how do you wipe your butt?

5. Are you just faking for attention?

6. How do you parent your child if you're blind?

7. Where are your sunglasses?

8. Do you know Steevie Wonder?

9. How do you walk?

10. How many fingers am I holding up?

11. What color is my hand?

12. Can you see me?

13. How do you read?

Though I could pick apart all of these for a million paragraphs, diagraming exactly why they are rediculous... I won't, at least not right now. That would be for another post on another day. For now, just join me and laugh at some of the silly things that blind people have been asked.

PS... please keep in mind that these questions were mostly asked by full grown adults... and then laugh a little harder

5 Reasons I'm Glad I Can't See

1. Some things are better left unsean... which will of course be explained further in the following entries.

2. The crack-heads that walk or ride their bikes around town toting their metal finds for their scrapping pleasure.

3. The guys that think it's sexy to expose half their butts to the world.

3. By contrast, those girls that think it's sexy and flattering to expose more skin than covered.

4. The dog that feels it necessary to poo in my front yard without my permission

5. Those people that think exceptable PDA is malling each other as heavily as they would do in a bedroom

There are of course many more and I will address them in future posts. If there are any you would like to add please feel free to leave them in the comment section of this post.

The good, The Bad, And The Ugly

No matter how positive a person is, it’s impossible to be optimistic all the time. Lately, I admit, I have been having the less than positive attitude. Don’t get me wrong, things are great.

Book stuff is wonderful and friends and family life is alive and kicking. The second situation is the reason for my slight state of dismay.

Having two beautiful daughters is the best part of my life. I would not change a single moment of it, even when I want to pull my hair out. Sometimes, one of them will do something adorable or new. I am elated for the newest milestone, but regret still floods my heart.

It’s a deep ache that stabs me all the way deep in my gut. My eyes start to sting and a lump forms in my throat. Sometimes, just being able to hear the even isn’t good enough.

Though I’m still happy it’s happened, I long to observe it for myself. Other people’s descriptions are great and much appreciated. It’s just not the same.

When Peanut started school, I was so happy for her. She was beyond excited and I don’t think her head left the clouds the entire morning. A genuine smile was plastered across my face. Inside, just inside, I was enveloped in a strenuous pity party.

It didn’t seem fair that I couldn’t see my baby at her first circle time, or doing the hand motions with her classmates to new songs. When she made her first new friend of the long school year, I couldn’t see the dimples on her cheeks as she smiled. When she played on the playground and rode in a wagon, I couldn’t see it for myself.

Am I usually down in the dumps about my situation? Nope, not at all. However, I feel it’s necessary to share everything with you, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The whole point of this blog is to shed a new light on the subject of blindness. I wanted to show people that there is a brighter side to the disability. Nevertheless, it is equally important to show the reality of the bad moments. Though they may be few and far between for me, they might not be for someone else.

To be able to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, you have to first see all angles of how they fit. So, that’s what this post is about. My shoes fit great, but sometimes there’s a lump in my sock that makes me uncomfortable for a minute.

Help Bring Clandestine and Divinity to Audio

I have launched a project on Kick Starter My project is to raise the funds necessary for creating audio books of Clandestine and Divinity.
As most of you know, Clandestine and Divinity are the first and second book in the Bound In Blood series. Clandestine was released in August of this year in both print and eBook formats and is doing very well.

I have received several messages, mainly from viewers of this blog to make the series in audio. In order to make this a reality sooner rather than later, I have turned to Kick Starter for help.

For each pledge you make, you will receive several great rewards and prizes. It is a win win situation. You would be helping an author make her dream come true and getting something cool in return.

Even if you decide not to pledge, I would really appreciate it if you could visit the page anyway. You can see a super cute video of my two girls that will make you smile. While you're there, please be sure to help spread the word by pressing the Facebook like button, tweet it and or pin it. This will help get the word out. The more people that hear about this the better.

So have I convinced you yet? Please visit the site below and check out the project and cute video of the girls.



Thanks again and I hope you decide to help:)

Craig Campbell Rocks The Show

Going to a concert when you are blind isn’t as bad as one might think. I recently took my oldest daughter Princess to a Craig Campbell concert. He is an amazing country singer that really knows how to entertain.

Firstly, it is a music concert so of course the blind would benefit. They have extra good hearing and can appreciate the quality of sound coming from the massive speakers.

Secondly, even though some entertainers do dance and run around the stage, seeing the activity isn’t necessary for enjoying the show. Most singers also banter in between songs and whether you are blind or sighted that can be really fun.

In Craig’s case, he has an awesome sense of humor and kept the crowd laughing in between the several songs that he played for us.

Another great thing about going to a live show is that you get to sometimes hear music that hasn’t yet been released. It’s kind of a sneak peak into the future. In this case, the new songs that Craig performed for us were amazing. He has a wicked good voice and a dead sexy speaking voice.

Because it was a show at a fair, Craig stayed behind afterward to sign autographs. I don’t just mean a few either. He stayed until every last person got something signed and took a picture with him that wanted one. How exhausting. I don’t know how he does it. He performs for a couple of hours standing pretty much the entire time and then stands for another couple of hours doing a meet and greet. What a devoted performer!

I had a very memorable experience when it got to be my turn with the country star. I will never forget it and my friends and family are still laughing about it and the concert was a few weeks ago. I will be posting the full story on Nicole Rae’s Blog and you will be able to find it HERE

Yes, I know it’s kind of a teaser, but hey, that’s what I live for. If you take the plunge and hop over there sign up to be a follower and then you will be notified when the hilarious Craig Campbell experience is posted for your viewing pleasure.

Thanks for reading and remember… “When life’s got you down, keep your head up… you can’t see the ground anyway.”

A Little About My New Project And A Little About Clandestine

I just got back from camping today and it’s been a very productive writing day. My kids have been absorbed in activities that they haven’t been able to do much in the last week or so which has allowed me to be very efficient with my latest project.

I am super excited about it because the main character of this one is a totally blind person. It isn’t as easy as you would think to write a character like that. Sure I can’t see so I can easily get into the person’s head to write them that’s true. But a reader (especially a sighted reader) wants description. A blind reader wants description too but for a different reason. I live by the saying that an audio book is a blind person’s television. This is because you don’t miss anything when you read like you do when you listen to your favorite show or movie.

Anyway as always I’m veering off track. In order to make a blind main character work affectively I have decided to make her someone who became blind rather than someone who was born that way. She has only been blind for a year so she is still in the stage where she is pretty much a Debbie Downer on the subject. It hasn’t dawned on her yet in the book that blindness isn’t the end of the world.

I went through a lot of mixed emotions when I lost my sight. I have also had gobs of people ask what that was like and how it felt. I thought it would be a good element to add to the story of such a multi faceted character.

The book is still in the beginning stages so I don’t want to give away much but I will tell you that I’m only at chapter 4 and I’m already falling in love with it. Don’t get me wrong I love Clandestine too but in an entirely different way. The Bound In Blood series is fun to write and I have put a lot into it. But with this project I’ve really delved into my soul and put a piece of my soul into it.

I hope you adore this story as much as I do. I am unsure yet if it will be a series but can definitely see the potential for one with the plot that is unraveling.

I promise to keep you up to date on that and also with the second book in the Bound In Blood series Divinity whenever possible. I know I have been neglecting my blogs lately and for that I’m sorry, I truly am. But its summer time so both kids are home full time, we’ve been camping a bunch and also been devoted to the new books I’m working on coupled with getting Clandestine out for your viewing pleasure.

There have been a lot of questions about whether or not Clandestine will be made into an audio book. When it is released it will only be available in print and EBook. BUT I promise that an audio version will be made available as soon as that is possible. Unfortunately, the production of an audio book is very expensive. I looked into hiring a narrator but the cheapest I have found is five hundred dollars and right now that is just not an option for me. That is definitely one down side to self publishing, accessible formats take a while if they come at all.

I have been looking into finding someone I know read it for me but that isn’t as easy as it looks either. I have to be sure the person has the right quality and tone to their voice to portray Emily as well as the rest of the slayer gang. It will be done I promise. I’m just not sure when.

I will write again soon and let you know how things are going. PS… I will be posting this same post on both my blogs so all of you will be equally informed.

I'm Blind But I Can Still Hear You

It’s possibly redundant but I feel I need to clarify something. Are you ready for this? Well here goes. Being blind doesn’t always mean you can’t hear.

I know shocker right? Well maybe not, but for some it apparently is. More often than you might think someone will yell at me when they find out I am blind. They will talk totally normal until that point.

What’s funny is how in one breath they are all “It’s so cool that you have heightened senses and stuff”, and then in the next they are yelling at you in case your lack of sight affects your ear canals. There are of course blind people that are also deaf. I however, am not one of those people. I do admit that occasionally I utilize selective hearing does come into play but that’s entirely different.

For the most part I smile good naturedly and don’t comment that they are blasting out my ear drums. And hey, that’s a huge concession on my part if you ask me. After all, if they blow the ear drums that would leave me with nothing but touch and smell.

There are days I want to look at them and yell back things like “WHAT DID YOU SAY? I’M SORRY I CAN’T SEE YOU!” Keep in mind that while I say this I would cup my hand over one eye like people do over an ear when they can’t hear something. I know kind of childish but I think it would be pretty funny. A girl’s gotta get her kicks somehow.
No I’m not in a “the glass is half empty” sort of mood. In fact, I am in a great mood. I have gotten a lot of work done on my book Clandestine I just had a random thought about this topic while editing and thought I would share it with you.

As you guys have heard me talk about before in earlier posts, one of the characters in Clandestine is blind. Her name is Lucy and in a scene she encounters this problem. I thought about making her reaction similar to the one mentioned above but haven’t decided yet if I should. Lucy is a perky girl that doesn’t have much of a filter. She does strike me as someone that would say something like that with a bright smile the whole time she was speaking. Who know, maybe I can work something like it in. I guess you will have to get the book when it’s released to find out… wink wink. Lol

Well I need to get back to the grind stone. This post was wiggling around in my brain so I needed to get it out so it would leave me alone. Okay don’t worry I am not weird or anything. The post obviously wasn’t freaking out in my head. I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. I get kind of OCD about things like that until I get it done.

If you haven’t signed up for my other blog that focuses on my writing and Clandestine please go take a peak and sign up. It is a fairly new blog but it’s getting updated all the time. I even do contests. My first will be ending today but I plan to do more in the future. This will be especially true around the time that Clandestine releases this summer. You can visit my other blog by clicking Here

Have a good day everyone. If you ever have any questions please feel free to share them in the comment section of this post or by sending me a private message using the contact link.

Blind Characters Are Fun To Write

As some of you may already know I am working on a Young Adult Paranormal novel that will be out this summer. It is called Clandestine and is the first book in the Slayer Saga series. It has been very fun to write and I hope that everyone likes it.

One thing you might not know is that Clandestine has a blind character. Her name is Lucy and she is an amazing person. She has a perky bubbly personality that you can’t help but fall in love with.

In Clandestine she doesn’t have a huge role in the story. There is enough of her though that you will be left wanting more and more of Lucy. In the second book Divinity however, she plays a bigger part of the supernatural tale. I am having a blast writing Lucy’s part in Divinity. I have seen few books that have a blind character as a main character. Thanks to my own personal experiences it’s easy to write a blind character.

During Clandestine, Emily Jameson (the main character) suspects that her best friend may be either just freakishly intuitive or possibly even psychic. She doesn’t put a lot of stock in the latter option because she honestly doesn’t believe much in the whole prospect of telepathy, the supernatural or in magic in general.

At least that’s true until she’s violently shoved into the underworld when her small little town is taken over by vampires. These ones aren’t the teen dream though. They aren’t vegetarians and don’t sparkle in the sunlight. They are carnivorous creatures with an unquenchable thirst for the blood of Lakeview’s residents.

Can the blood suckers be stopped before the town is completely drained of life? Don’t let everyone else find out first! Pick up your copy of Clandestine as soon as it’s released. For more information and a chance to read the blurb about Clandestine visit my other blog at http://www.authornicolerae.blogspot.com

You can also find a link directly to the site on this page under the heading Visit My Other Sites. Please sign up to follow that blog as well as this one if you haven’t already. Help spread the words to all your friends and fellow readers by sharing this post and the ones from the other blog on Facebook, Twitter and in any other way you can.

Thanks for all your support and happy reading.

Different Is Beautiful

All I see is blackness
My eyes are open
Still, nothing but darkness
Close your eyes
See what I see
But know for me there is no compromise
You treat me differently, as though I’m invisible
But I can still hear you
Even if you’re not visible
No matter our differences my feelings run true
It hurts to be ignored but laughter is grand
The same as it is for you
Even in the darkness I see you
So why in the light
Do you still have no clue
Open your mind
Turn off your judgments
You may like what you find
Equality is sweet
Differences are beautiful
So shake my hand the next time we meet

Written by: Nicole Rae

10 Things Better Not To Say To A Blind Person

1. “Look at that!”

2. “OMG did you see that?!”

3. “Can you grab the wheel for a second?”

4. “You’re not really blind. You’re faking.”

5. “Did you know ray Charles?”

6. “In your imagination, are you still blind?”

7. “Catch!”

8. “Do I have something in my teeth?”

9. “I waved at you when I saw you at the store yesterday. Why didn’t you wave back? That was rude.”

10. “We need to get their in a hurry. Do you wanna borrow my bike?”

You can Look But Don't Touch

Lots of blind people all across the world have a guide dog as their chosen form of mobility. They enjoy the freedom that a steady moving guide can bring into their lives. As much as a furry friend can offer a sightless person it can also cause some bumps along the road. However, these obstacles are not always the dogs fault.

Many of the people around the team don’t know the right and wrong way to interact with a blind person with a guide dog. Of course the puppy is cute and looks so incredibly cuddly. Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean you should try and coax it over to you for a rub down or a baby talk session.

Rule number one for people who come across a guide team is you can look but don’t touch. It is never under any circumstance okay to interrupt a dog. When they are helping their person get from point “A” to point “B”, they are working. You wouldn’t walk into a surgery that is already in progress to quiz the doctor on the type of soap he used before opening up the patients heart would you?

Interrupting a guide while they are hard at work can be just as detrimental. Distractions cause accidents and accidents cause injuries. You may not intend on causing harm when you whistle at their beautiful Lab but it may very well happen. It might seem like an alright thing to do but it’s not.

A guide dog and their person are trained to work in sink together as a unified team. They communicate to each other all the time even if not in words. Once distracted the link is broken. A guide in essence is of course just like any other dog. If someone talks sweet or whistles at them they are going to turn their head and possibly trot over. But what if this happens while standing on a street corner? The dog may try to barrel across to greet you forgetting their person is still attached to the harness. This can put both the dog and their person in potential danger from passing cars.

If a guide dog is constantly bombarded with people trying to distract him or her they may become overwhelmed. It can in some cases be difficult for a person to get their guide back on track. The dogs guide work will suffer because of this and become sloppy. They may be too busy thinking about what the stranger distracting them is doing to notice a pole that’s clearly in their person’s path.

If you encounter a guide team and you are in position to reach out and touch the dog, please refrain from doing so. It is frowned upon by most blind people for someone to randomly pet their dog. Some will allow such interactions but only with permission. If they say no don’t be offended. They just might not have time or the dog may not handle interaction with other people gracefully. For some dogs, once they get that one pat on the head they can’t stop looking for their next fix from those passing by.

Don’t worry; guide dogs are not abused, unloved or lacking in the loving attention department. Even if you don’t see a blind person playing or cuddling with their guide that doesn’t mean they don’t have a deeply attached relationship. Most guide teams have a closer nit bond than that of a regular man’s best friend type of situation. After all, a guide dog works hard every day to ensure their person is safe every second that they are out and about. The blind person thereby puts all of their trust and their life into the guide dog’s capable paws. This makes for a firm lasting connection. Many people say for them it was love at first lick.

Helping To Teach Tolerance

One good aspect of being the only blind member in your family is your ability to teach tolerance. It’s the perfect way for a “normal” person to have positive interactions with a disabled person. Most of all problems start from lack of knowledge. Having a disabled person in the family is a chance to learn that different is beautiful.

Many people react strongly when face to face with someone who is different than what they are used to. For some it’s hard to even approach a disabled person. They may even give them a wide birth and simply stare from a distance. Unfortunately, there is a multitude of complications with this reaction. First, by not approaching the person you may be missing out on a meaningful interaction that could form a long lasting friendship. Second, the person you’re staring at probably is well aware of the fact that you are staring at them. Third, you’re missing out on a chance to answer your own inquiries about the type of disability the person has.

Another common reaction is to treat the disabled person as though they are not mentally capable of holding an intelegent conversation/dialogue. For example: It’s never necessary to treat a thirty year old blind man as though he has the mental capacity of a three year old. All this will cause is a negative response from the person you’re attempting to interact with. The only incidence you should talk to a person as though they are a child is if they are one.
If you see a blind person (or any other type of disabled person) don’t be afraid to approach them. They wont bite, at least not mormaly. If you like their shirt tell them. If you have a question ask it of them. If asked appropriately the question will more than likely receive a positive reaction and maybe you will learn something about the person in the process. The only dumb question is the one you didn’t ask. I myself would much rather have someone ask me a question about my blindness then have them sit there and stare at me wondering silently.

When a disabled person is in your family that allows you to have normal day to day interactions with that person. It unconsciously teaches you that there’s a person behind the disability. They are not just a label from a pigeon hole stereotype. They have feelings, thoughts, opinions and knowledge that are valuable if just given the chance to express them. Instead of saying “this is my cousin Nikki and she’s blind”, maybe you’ll learn to say “this is my cousin Nikki and she’s a funny, intelegent wonderful person who just happens to be blind”. A disability is a very small part of someone. It is in no way, shape, or form the defining factor of their character.

A wonderful example of learned tolerance from my own life is that of my niece. She has grown up with a blind auntie pretty much all of her life. She has never known me with sight at least that she remembers. I lost my sight when she was far to young to have a strong recollection of me being able to see her.

When she was barely in grade school she was faced with a blind classmate that was in her grade. None of her other classmates played with the blind girl and she was always alone at recess other than her helper. A lot of the kids stared and whispered about her and rarely talked to her directly.

This of course changed with my niece. She was used to being around me, so she knew the right way to interact and assist a blind person. She took it apon herself to talk to the girl and get to know her. She assisted her when needed without doing so in a mocking way. They became good friends both at school and outside of it. My niece didn’t allow a small difference to influence her decision to make a knew friend. I am very proud of her for taking the chance and going against the grain.

If more people took this stand in life it would be a much more tolerant place for all. Difference IS beautiful and knowledge IS power. I challenge my readers to make an effort to connect with a person they would otherwise not interact with. I promise the result will be worth it and will have a meaningful impact on your life.

PS… I apologize for referring to the girl in my example as “the blind girl”. This was in no way intended to go against my advice and place a label on her. I don’t like to name names in my stories and it was simply a method of differentiating her in the story for clarification purposes only.

Did That really Just Happen 2

This story in particular is one of my favorites. I hope you get as much enjoyment out of the experience as I did. It happened several years ago and it still makes me laugh when I think about it…

A long time ago I used to live in a large apartment complex with roughly a hundred apartments. My building was three stories with eighteen apartments within it. I myself lived on the ground floor at the end of the building. The front door was located in a sort of corridor. It faced the door to my next door neighbor’s apartment.

One night I was relaxing in my apartment with my oldest daughter who was about two at the time. We were watching a movie cuddled up on the couch. I remember it was Toy Story. It was one of her obsessions back then we probably watched it a gazillion times a week.

About half way into it we were interrupted by a knock at the door. I pushed pause on the movie and listened carefully. I thought maybe it could have been on the neighbor’s door. It was fairly late and I wasn’t expecting anyone. It’s worth mentioning I hate when this happens. One of my irrational fears is that I’m going to open the door and get attacked since I can’t see it coming. I’m too short to reach a peep hole let alone be able to see out of one. Therefore, if I ask who it is and someone doesn’t answer, they don’t get in.

The knock sounded at the door again and I jumped. Slowly I made my way down the long hallway. Again, I know totally ridiculous but I used to always think if I didn’t walk cautiously the scary boogie man would get me for sure.
Once at the door I called, “Who is it?”

Nothing.

“Who is it?” This time I listened intently for any sign of who my visitor was.

Nothing. There wasn’t even so much as the sound of a shoe scuffing on the ground outside. The only noise was from the wind blowing through the corridor. Can I just say that totally added to the creep me out factor while I stood there.

I put my ear closer to the door. “Who is…”

Suddenly I was interrupted by another insistent knock at the door. I jumped back so fast as my heart violently thudding in my chest now. Why wasn’t who ever it was answering me? I wasn’t going to answer. It could have been a vicious serial killer waiting to bludgeon me to death. All though, you would think they would have been more stealthy. Pounding on my door would get the attention of the neighbors. At least you would think anyway. Not one door opened to see what the commotion was about.

My thoughts were interrupted by another knock more hurried this time. Now I was just getting irritated. Even if it was a psychopath they were just being rude.

In my most annoyed tone I said, “Seriously who is it? If you want me to open the door you gotta tell me who you are.”

Nothing again.

This was getting ridiculous. But as I was thinking that another stinkin knock sounded.

“Look a**hole! This isn’t funny! I’m not opening the door unless you tell me who you are!” As I roared out the response I held the phone up poised to dial. I may have sounded tough but it was all vibrato. I was shaking with both fear and irritation at this point. I had heard once that at these apartments someone had kicked in a door to break in. I of course was envisioning this while I stood there which help oh so much.

In the distance I heard a car door close. Finally, someone was going to observe what ever was going on here. Scuffling foot steps were walking into the corridor. Then there were mumbled voices behind my door. Ah hell, what was it my killers accomplice? Was that a laugh I just heard?

After a few seconds that stretched on like hours another knock came on my door. This time though it was much gentler and was followed by a voice.

“Excuse me?” The voice was polite. “It’s your neighbor from upstairs,” the voice called through to me.

I recognized the voice but had no idea who it was. “Who else is out there with you?” I asked shakily.

The stranger laughed. Actually laughed before replying. “It’s my boyfriend. He’s been knocking at your door for a while I guess. I’m Mat and his name is Antonio. I’ve seen you around, you’re blind right?”

Says the cat sweetly to the unsuspecting little mouse before he eats it. “Um…did you guys need something cuz if not I’m gonna call the cops.” I couldn’t help the acid in my voice. Sure this guy was being polite sort of but still. Why does he care if I’m blind? Why didn’t his boyfriend talk or at least go away when I didn’t answer? I wasn’t about to answer the door no matter how nice he was. And what did it matter that I was blind?

“Well… it seems the two of you are kind of a double edged sword,” he replied easily.

Okay so not the right metaphor to use with someone who is already freaked out. I didn’t say anything to him. Instead, I called my next door neighbor and asked her to come out and help me because these people were not leaving. The one called Mat seemed nice enough but I wasn’t taking that chance.

Once she came out she apparently was immediately clued into something I didn’t get.  “It’s alright Nick you can come out,” she said through laughter.

Tentatively I gave in and opened the door.

“Hi my name’s Mat.” The guy said in friendly tones. He took my hand and shook it.

“Hi? I’m Nikki?” I was so confused my words came out like a question. I wish someone would explain to me what the hell was going on.

As if hearing my thoughts Mat spoke in a soothing voice that barely masked the fact he was about to laugh. “I’m really sorry about this. I hope Antonio didn’t scare you. He wanted to know if you had some butter. He seen your light on and was sure you were home.”

“K…” I replied brilliantly.

Suddenly another hand was in mine shaking it. It felt smoother than Mat’s so I assumed it was Antonio’s. He didn’t speak though. He just made a noise that was between a grunt and a hum.

Then spoke Mat again, “This is Antonio. The reason he wasn’t answering you was because he’s deaf.”

Instantly my face floodd with red and I could feel it getting hotter by the second. “So he didn’t answer me because he’s… deaf?” My voice trailed off in bewilderment.

“Right,” said mat.

My next words came out slowly. I was still trying to figure it all out. “And I couldn’t see him so I wasn’t answering..?”

I asked the question more to myself then to Mat but he answered anyway.  “It would appear so.”

After a brief awkward silence the corridor erupted with hysterical laughter. Everyone was in stitches over the irony of the situation. Even Antonio was laughing so either Mat was signing to him or my slow idiot take made for easy lip reading.

After that night any time Antonio wanted to come to my door he called first or got someone to knock with him. He obviously was not psycho serial killer intent on bludgeoning me to death. He actually turned out to be a very nice guy and a good friend. It was an interesting friendship I admit, but one I will never forget.