Showing posts with label tolerance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tolerance. Show all posts

Friday, September 28, 2012

Did That Really Just Happen 4

I haven’t had a Did That Really Just Happen moment in a while. I happened to have such an experience on Peanuts second day of school. I never would have expected an incident there, but what can you do? It just goes to show these things can happen anywhere.

I was there with my mom, dropping little Miss Peanut off in the morning. The first thing they do before breakfast is circle time. After this activity, the kids are directed to go and wash their hands before meal time.

Mom and I were just getting ready to leave when someone approached. “He,” a soft voice said.

I could tell it was an older man. I didn’t recognize the voice and had no idea who it was. “Hi,” I sounded a little unsure than intended, but the man didn’t seem to notice.

“Do you know the Crunks?” He seemed very hopeful, though his voice was barely above a whisper.

I searched my memory bank high and low. The name didn’t ring a bell at all. “No,” I replied. “Do they have a child in this class?” Stupidly, I found myself looking around for the Crunk family as if I could pick them out of a crowd. This was ridiculous on so many levels. Even if I had known who the Crunks were (which I didn’t), then I wouldn’t have been able to see them. So scanning the room was a pointless effort.

“No, they live on the east coast,” he said, dead serious. “I used to live there too. They had a son who was blind.”

“Oh,” I responded a little confused. “That’s cool.”

“Yeah, he was a nice kid. I thought maybe you two might know each other.”

Trying hard not to laugh I said, “Nope, sorry. Well, me and my mom are leaving now. I’ll see you later.”

He made his goodbyes since he was leaving too. He never said anything else about the Crunk family and left me more than a little baffled.

Why is it that some people assume that because you’re blind you must know every single blind person in the world? lol I wonder if the same rule applies to the deaf community. I didn’t react rude to this because it wasn’t ill intended. Some people just genuinely think this is how it works. I thought this was really cute. It used to happen a lot more often, but I haven’t experienced it in a while.

Has this ever happened to you? If so tell me about it in the comment section of this post. I am also looking for guest posters for this blog. If you have a funny Did That Really Just Happen moment and it’s too long to put in a comment, send me a message and set up a guest post. I’d love to have you. Just use the contact link on this page or leave me your email in the contact section.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Helping To Teach Tolerance

One good aspect of being the only blind member in your family is your ability to teach tolerance. It’s the perfect way for a “normal” person to have positive interactions with a disabled person. Most of all problems start from lack of knowledge. Having a disabled person in the family is a chance to learn that different is beautiful.

Many people react strongly when face to face with someone who is different than what they are used to. For some it’s hard to even approach a disabled person. They may even give them a wide birth and simply stare from a distance. Unfortunately, there is a multitude of complications with this reaction. First, by not approaching the person you may be missing out on a meaningful interaction that could form a long lasting friendship. Second, the person you’re staring at probably is well aware of the fact that you are staring at them. Third, you’re missing out on a chance to answer your own inquiries about the type of disability the person has.

Another common reaction is to treat the disabled person as though they are not mentally capable of holding an intelegent conversation/dialogue. For example: It’s never necessary to treat a thirty year old blind man as though he has the mental capacity of a three year old. All this will cause is a negative response from the person you’re attempting to interact with. The only incidence you should talk to a person as though they are a child is if they are one.
If you see a blind person (or any other type of disabled person) don’t be afraid to approach them. They wont bite, at least not mormaly. If you like their shirt tell them. If you have a question ask it of them. If asked appropriately the question will more than likely receive a positive reaction and maybe you will learn something about the person in the process. The only dumb question is the one you didn’t ask. I myself would much rather have someone ask me a question about my blindness then have them sit there and stare at me wondering silently.

When a disabled person is in your family that allows you to have normal day to day interactions with that person. It unconsciously teaches you that there’s a person behind the disability. They are not just a label from a pigeon hole stereotype. They have feelings, thoughts, opinions and knowledge that are valuable if just given the chance to express them. Instead of saying “this is my cousin Nikki and she’s blind”, maybe you’ll learn to say “this is my cousin Nikki and she’s a funny, intelegent wonderful person who just happens to be blind”. A disability is a very small part of someone. It is in no way, shape, or form the defining factor of their character.

A wonderful example of learned tolerance from my own life is that of my niece. She has grown up with a blind auntie pretty much all of her life. She has never known me with sight at least that she remembers. I lost my sight when she was far to young to have a strong recollection of me being able to see her.

When she was barely in grade school she was faced with a blind classmate that was in her grade. None of her other classmates played with the blind girl and she was always alone at recess other than her helper. A lot of the kids stared and whispered about her and rarely talked to her directly.

This of course changed with my niece. She was used to being around me, so she knew the right way to interact and assist a blind person. She took it apon herself to talk to the girl and get to know her. She assisted her when needed without doing so in a mocking way. They became good friends both at school and outside of it. My niece didn’t allow a small difference to influence her decision to make a knew friend. I am very proud of her for taking the chance and going against the grain.

If more people took this stand in life it would be a much more tolerant place for all. Difference IS beautiful and knowledge IS power. I challenge my readers to make an effort to connect with a person they would otherwise not interact with. I promise the result will be worth it and will have a meaningful impact on your life.

PS… I apologize for referring to the girl in my example as “the blind girl”. This was in no way intended to go against my advice and place a label on her. I don’t like to name names in my stories and it was simply a method of differentiating her in the story for clarification purposes only.